The pricing psychology behind why they didn’t choose you

I once lost a $30,000 project by asking about budget.

Not because they couldn't afford it. But because the moment I asked "what's your budget?", I saw their face change. Like I'd just asked to see their browser history.

They mumbled something about "seeing what options were out there" and disappeared faster than my hairline in my thirties.

Here's what took me years to figure out:

Asking about budget is like asking someone their weight at a first date. Even if they're proud of it, the question makes them feel weird and judged.

Let’s dive in:

You're playing pricing poker with your cards face up

Most founders think pricing is about math.

Wrong.

Pricing is about psychology. And you're shit at it.

You throw out a number and pray they don't flinch. They counter with something insulting. You meet in the middle and hate yourself for the next six months while you do the work for half what it's worth.

I know because I did this dance for years.

Charged $500 for websites that took me three weeks to build. That’s $4 an hour, if you don’t count electricity, software, or dignity. McDonald's workers made more than me, and they got free nuggets.

The worst part?

Clients who paid less demanded more. They'd call at 10pm about moving a button two pixels to the left. Meanwhile, the few who paid proper money? They trusted me to do my job and left me alone.

The brain science of budget panic

When you ask "what's your budget?", here's what's really happening: